


Someone We Used to Know

by mallardeer



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2018-12-18 09:58:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11871954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mallardeer/pseuds/mallardeer
Summary: Clark Kent and Lena Luthor have more than just Kara Danvers in common.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Forgive me. I just made up this whole timeline, but the show doesn't know how to handle time correctly either, so. We'll go with it.
> 
> I have been thinking about this ever since James yelled at Kara for trusting Lena just like Clark had trusted Lex.

The first time she sees him again, after more than twenty years, he all but barges into her office, trailed by some young blonde, and calls her, “Ms. Luthor.” Unfailingly polite, just as she’d expect from Clark Kent, but also there’s no question as to the distance between them now.

Not that they’d ever been close. He and Lex were—are—so much older than her, but she…remembers him. There was a summer when he and Lex were nearly inseparable. She was so young, and they were busy with their grand plans for the future, but she was always chasing after them.

When there are nights that seem like they might never end, when she casts about in her long memory for glimpses of happiness—his smile appears more often than she’d expect.

But Clark Kent seems to hate the name Luthor now, and really, she can’t blame him. Still, there’s a part of her that can’t resist goading him a little bit, calling out the steel under his Kansas wheat, and smirking as the blonde glances worriedly at him. “And who might you be?” she asks levelly, focusing on the young woman in order to clear her mind of childhood memories.   
  
The girl blinks at her and then introduces herself as “Kara Danvers, Catco Magazine,” and she has no idea what to make of that. The bristly part of her, the part that keeps her guard up all the time, makes a somewhat snide remark about Catco Magazine’s lack of cutting edge reporting, but Kara Danvers just shrugs it away and lets Clark take the lead.   
  
So she is forced to insist she had nothing to do with the shuttle explosion, that all she wants is a chance to make her own way, separate from her family. A small part of her wants Clark to remember her, and she finds herself asking him if she can understand her need to make a name for herself. Something in him defrosts, and he even smiles a little. “I suppose I can,” he admits, and she sighs a very small sigh of relief.

And finds herself smiling at Kara, who blinks dazedly back at her before following Clark out the door.

That morning, it had seemed like it was going to be harder than she’d thought to leave Metropolis behind her. Luckily, it hadn’t been very difficult to get Clark—and Kara—on her side.

But even as she and Kara grow closer, Clark keeps his distance. He seems to trust Kara’s decision to trust her, and he remains polite, but he never gives any indication that he remembers her. She can’t blame him, really. He must not like thinking about Lex any more than she does.

So one morning, after she and Kara have been dating for several months, she is rather shocked to get a personal call from him.  “Why, Mr. Kent. What can I do for you?” she asks.   
  
He laughs, a familiar warmth in the sound. She can almost remember hearing it from her bedroom, when he and Lex would stay up into the night, tinkering with science projects and debating morality in Lex’s room. “Good morning, Lena. I have…a somewhat unusual request. Could I ask you to meet me for coffee?”  
  
“This morning? I’m sure I can clear my schedule for the famous Daily Planet reporter,” Lena finds herself teasing, almost as naturally as she teases Kara.   
  
Clark laughs again, and again Lena has flashes of her childhood, when her brother was her hero, and Clark Kent was a fixture in the Luthor home.

“I’d appreciate it. Shall we say Noonan’s at nine o’clock?”  
  
“Oh, are you in the city?” she asks, surprised, and he chuckles guiltily, as she realizes what a silly question that was. But it’s only been a few months since she’d discovered that kind, stolid Clark Kent is actually Superman. She supposes she’s still not used to it. “Of course, that doesn’t matter, does it? Kara brought me dinner from Thailand last Friday,” she shares, and Clark laughs.   
  
“Lois gets mad at me when I do that,” he admits, and she smiles, briefly imagining Lois Lane berating a sheepish Superman. “  
  
“Well, anyway. I will see you at nine, Clark.”  
  
“I look forward to it, Lena.”

As soon as she hangs up with Clark, her phone rings again. “Good morning, Kara,” she says, somehow not surprised that she’d hear from her right away.   
  
“Good morning! Do you have time for breakfast before work?” Kara asks cheerfully.   
  
“Actually, your cousin just asked me to meet him for coffee,” Lena says.  
  
“My cous—Clark called you?” Kara says, clearly baffled.  
  
“I imagine something about Lex must have come up,” Lena offers, sighing. “I’ll let you know what happens.”  
  
“Oh, sure, only if you want to. But let that sneak cousin of mine know he’d better say hello to me before he leaves.”  
  
Lena laughs. “I’m sure Superman can make time for you, Kara. I’ll see you later, okay?”

“Okay. Love you,” Kara says easily, and hangs up before Lena can manage to say the words back.

She’s said them before, but not very often. It’s frustrating how easily they get stuck in her throat.

Shaking her head, she finishes getting ready and then heads out to Noonan’s, which is of course right around the block from Catco, so she runs into James there. “Oh, hey, morning, Lena,” he says with a bright grin. “What you brings you over to this side of town?”

  
“Oh, actually, Clark asked me to meet him here this morning,” Lena says, trying to be casual.

“Clark? Oh. I didn’t know he was in town,” James says, and then laughs at Lena’s raised eyebrow. “Right, right. Well, enjoy your apparent secret meeting with my former best friend.”  
  
“James,” Lena laughs, and leans up to kiss his cheek. “I’ll give him your best. Or. Just wait for him to get here.”

“I would, but—gotta run. News never sleeps.” He smiles at her and hurries off.   
  
She orders a latte and takes a seat, suddenly nervous. What on earth could be going on that Clark would need to speak to her in person?

When Clark arrives, she stands up, and he busses her cheek, smiling in a way that reminds her quite forcefully of Kara. She finds herself blushing, but he is too kind to say anything, just asks if she’d like a muffin or a scone or anything as he goes to order his own breakfast.   
  
“Oh, no thank you, I’m fine,” she says, flustered, and those green eyes twinkle at her from behind his glasses.

He returns quickly and puts a chocolate chip scone in front of her. “I feel like I remember these being popular with…someone in your house,” he says charmingly, and her eyes flutter shut.  
  
“Do you really remember me, from back then?” she asks, swallowing hard.   
  
“Of course I do,” he says easily. “I remember a small, dark-haired blur chasing Lex everywhere.” He grins at her, and she shakes her head. 

“You’ve been acting like you didn’t,” she says, much more accusatorily than she’d meant to, and feels herself blush.  
  
Clark sighs, running a hand through his dark hair. “Forgive me, Lena,” he says quietly. “It was…painful to remember that part of our friendship.”  
  
She nods. “Of course, of course. It’s…not easy for me to think about most of my childhood.”  
  
He smiles sadly and makes a move like he wants to take her hand, but he ultimately drops his into his lap. “I remember you as a blur too,” she murmurs, picking up the scone. “I was thinking that I remembered your smile, your laugh. You were one of the only people who could ever get him to laugh.”

“It took me a long time to find his sense of humor,” he says wryly, and Lena smirks, and they lapse into silence.

“Anyway,” he says, clearing his throat. “I’m sure you’re wondering what I’m doing here.”  
  
“I must confess that I am,” she says lightly.   
  
“I was home this weekend, in Kansas, going through boxes of all my old things, and I found… Well, this,” he says, and slides a 4x6 photo across the table to her.

It’s a picture that must be twenty-five years old; it’s the three of them, on one of the rare occasions Clark had been able to pull Lex away from his work. They’re outside, beneath a tall maple tree in the Luthors’ backyard, and Clark has his arm casually slung across Lex’s shoulders. And she… She is sitting atop Lex’s shoulders, tugging on his hair and absolutely beaming down at Clark, who is smiling gently up at her. Lex, her kind but dour-faced brother, is grinning right at the camera. The magnitude of his smile shocks her.

She can’t remember either of them ever being that happy.

“Do you remember this, Lena?” he asks softly, and tears sting her eyes as she shakes her head.   
  
“Who took this?” she asks. It wouldn’t have been Lillian, not in a million years.  
  
“Your father,” Clark tells her. “It was the day before Lex and I were headed back to school, and I forced Lex out of his dungeon lab to get some fresh air for once in his life. You saw us head into the backyard and came pelting after us. You ran right into Lex’s arms, and for the first time in weeks, he smiled.”  
  
“Oh. Clark, I…”  
  
He puts a gentle hand over hers. “I miss him a lot,” he says quietly, “the friend I used to know. And this…this finally made me realize that you probably do too.”  
  
“Yes,” she admits, still staring at the photo, at their younger selves. Clark, looking much as he does now, but with shaggier hair; Lex, his smile so unfamiliar, still with enough hair for her to dig her fingers into; and her, so impossibly young, and still so trusting—and so effortlessly happy. And her father, behind the lens, seeing his children delighted and somehow thinking to take a picture. Lionel could be cold, just like Lillian, but he had had rare moments of warmth, of engagement with his family.   
  
“I worried about you, after I saw what he’d become, but I didn’t…” Clark lifts his hand, shakes his head. “It shouldn’t have taken you growing close to Kara for me to reach out to you.”  
  
“Oh, Clark, I was just a little kid you saw for one summer,” she says, lifting her eyes to his.   
  
He shrugs. “I think I was scared that he’d gotten to you—and that I wouldn’t be able to help if he had.”

“I don’t understand how it happened,” she says quietly. “He was always busy, with his lab, with the business, but he always made time for me. He helped me with my history homework; he taught me how to balance chemical equations before I turned ten. He brought me to the lab on the weekends before I was even tall enough to see over the tables. When Lillian was cruel, he would comfort me. I never…” She looks up at Clark, beseeching. “I never saw that side to him, not until it was already too late.”  
  
“Me neither,” Clark says heavily. “Everyone was warning me that he wasn’t what he seemed, but we’d been through college together, and he was still one of my best friends, and…I couldn’t see it—didn’t want to see it.”

“Love is blind,” Lena says ruefully.   
  
“It takes…a kind of strength to be able to believe the worst of someone you love,” Clark says. “I’ve never had that strength.”  
  
“Neither have I,” Lena says. “Do you know, Kara came to me and practically begged me to help her stop Cadmus, back when I first moved here? She said Lillian was behind it all, and even after everything Lillian had put me through, I refused to believe her. I’d lost my father, I’d lost Lex. Whatever our issues, Lillian was my only family left. And when Kara handed me that news, I couldn’t make myself believe Lillian was truly that evil.”

“But you did help Kara,” Clark reminds her, and she sighs.   
  
“After a very painful hour of soul searching. I realized it was more likely that she was right than that she was trying to torment me. But that was… That was when I had to face it. Every member of my family…gone to hell.” She can’t swallow the tears any longer, and they stream down her cheeks, hot and silent.   
  
Clark carefully takes the seat next to hers and puts his arm around her, pulling her close. “Well. A family is never just those people who share your last name,” he says, and kisses her head in a very brotherly way.

“You’re very kind, Clark Kent,” she says, wiping her eyes.   
  
“I try to be,” he says. “I’m sorry to have upset you, Lena.”  
  
“No, it’s… I haven’t been able to talk about any of this,” she confesses. “The world knows Lex Luthor as a monster, and they’re right, but he also…was just a man. With a kid sister who came out of nowhere and followed him everywhere. I think you might be the only person who knows that version of him.”

Clark nods. “Yes, it would seem so.”

She lets her head rest against his neck and waits for her mind to clear a bit. Then she lifts her head and smiles tentatively at him. “Thank you, for this.”  
  
“Thank you, for talking about him with me.”

“Anytime,” she says, and realizes she means it, and his broad smile lights up his face.  
  
“For you too,” he tells her. “Really.”  
  
She nods and slowly stands. “I’d better get to the office.”  
  
“Of course. Do you want the picture?” he asks, holding it out to her.  
  
For a second she wavers, and then she takes it. It might not hurt to have a reminder that she and Lex were both actually happy in that house, and it is a nice picture. “Thank you,” she says quietly, and he smiles a familiar comforting smile, the one she sees on Kara’s face nearly every day.

It was probably the luckiest day of her life when the two of them walked into her office.

“Well. Take care, Lena. I’ll see you soon, I’m sure,” he says, and she hugs him tight.  
  
“Oh! Clark. James sends his best, and Kara said to tell her ‘sneak cousin’ to say hello to her before he leaves,” she remembers, grinning at him, and he chuckles.   
  
“Never fear,” he promises, winking as he heads to the door.

She watches him head around the corner to Catco and then looks at the picture once more before tucking it into her purse. It’s strange how her family’s mortal enemies have made it easier for her to be a Luthor, but she’s realized she’s finally starting to feel at peace with who she is.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena talks things out with Kara now.

When she gets home late that evening, she finds Kara on her couch, watching a movie and eating lo mein out of the carton. “Hi!” Kara says, bouncing over the couch to pull her into her arms. “I had a long, long day. And clearly you did too. So I ordered Chinese.”  
  
“You’re wonderful,” Lena sighs, letting herself collapse against Kara.

“Mmm, you are,” Kara murmurs, kissing her hair. “Go get changed. I’ll fix you a plate,” she says, taking Lena’s coat and purse.  
  
Lena laughs and obediently goes to her bedroom to put on lounging clothes. When she returns, Kara has set her plate on the coffee table. “Did Clark stop by to see you?” Lena asks, and Kara laughs.  
  
“Yes, he told me you let him know I thought he was a sneak,” she says, grinning up at her.  
  
Lena laughs and drops onto the couch beside her, and though the food smells delicious, she ignores it and curls her body into Kara’s. “Oh. Hey,” Kara murmurs, rubbing her back. “Is everything okay?”

“Mmm,” Lena replies affirmatively. “I just like you.”

Kara chuckles fondly. “I like you too, Lee. Fair warning, though. If you don’t eat that in the next five minutes, I will.”

Lena smirks, but hides her face in Kara’s neck. “Hey,” Kara says again, voice tender, as gentle fingers thread through her hair. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“Nothing, nothing,” Lena insists, and it’s not a lie, not really. Nothing is wrong. She just needs to be close to Kara right now, to breathe in the scent of her perfume, her shampoo, and to hear the rhythm of her heartbeat.  
  
“Okay,” Kara says dubiously, but she continues to stroke Lena’s hair and doesn’t push for more information.  
  
Eventually, Lena is soothed enough to eat her dinner, but she still stays as close to Kara as possible. Kara, for her part, is clearly bemused but also happy to have Lena so easily affectionate, so she says nothing, just steals pieces of kung pao chicken off Lena’s plate. 

“You know, using your super powers to steal my food is a new low for you, Kara,” Lena remarks, after the third time.

“What? I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Kara mumbles, hastily swallowing the chicken.  
  
Lena smiles and leans up to kiss her. “You’re lucky you’re so cute.”  
  
“Hey!” Kara laughs, but she’s obviously delighted instead of offended.  
  
When Lena finishes her food, she curls back up with Kara, resting her head on Kara’s shoulder. “Something is bothering you, Lee,” Kara says, stroking her hair. “You don’t have to tell me, but. I know this isn’t how you are after a regular long day at the office.”  
  
“Clark…wanted to talk to me about Lex,” Lena says slowly, lifting her head up. Kara’s eyes grow wide, but she doesn’t interrupt. “They were friends, you know, really friends. There was a summer, after their freshman year at college, I think, that Clark was over at my house...every day. I don’t really remember him from back then, but I do remember that summer was the first time I’d ever heard Lex laugh. Really laugh.”  
  
Kara’s eyes are soft now, and there’s a smile hiding just behind them. “I know about Clark and Lex,” Kara tells her. “Some people kept reminding me that Clark had trusted him and suffered for it when…” Her jaw clenches, and Lena’s stomach drops. “When I decided to trust you,” she finishes.

And Lena knows that, of course she does. Everywhere she turns, there’s someone who assumes she’s just like Lex—just like their mother. But to hear Kara say it—even if she was never one of those people herself—hurts her in a whole new way. 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispers, resting her forehead against Lena’s temple. “That wasn’t… It’s just…”

Lena puts her arms around Kara’s neck and kisses her cheek. “I know,” she says, accepting Kara’s comfort. Then she sighs and pushes away, though Kara pulls her back. 

“I’ve been afraid for years that I would turn into him, despite my best efforts. When I lost Jack, when I let Rhea manipulate me—when I finished his device to expel the Daxamites from earth—I got so close,” Lena whispers, anguished, and Kara holds her more tightly. 

“You are not like him,” Kara insists, but Lena shakes her head.  
  
“I am. He used to tell me that all the time, and it was the greatest thing I’d ever heard. I idolized him. And I couldn’t see what he was becoming, and I couldn’t save him.”  
  
“Hey, you were a kid. He made all those choices himself, Lena.”  
  
“I just… I miss him. I miss my brother, before he became…what he is.” Lena chokes on a sudden sob, and Kara kisses her head.  
  
“I know,” Kara murmurs soothingly. “It’s okay, sweetheart.”  
  
“Clark misses him too,” Lena says, getting herself back under control. “I never even thought…” She lifts her head up, looks at Kara. “I don’t think I’ve let myself grieve, for losing him.”  
  
Kara nods. “It’s hard, isn’t it, to face the fact that he’s not coming back?” she says, and her voice is gentle but full of pain.  
  
“Oh, Kara,” Lena murmurs, reaching up to stroke her hair. “You have…such a lovely family here, I never think of all that you’ve lost.”

“Oh, no, you don’t have to apologize. We can talk about me later,” Kara says quickly.  “I just… I know how hard it is…to reconcile the person you loved with the person they really are. And I’m here, any time you want to talk about him.”

“Thank you,” Lena says quietly. She wants to show Kara the picture; she wants Kara to know, really know, that her brother wasn’t always awful. 

But Kara’s arms around her are the most comforting things in the world right now, and she has worn herself out, and so before she can decide anything, her head has fallen to Kara’s shoulder. “You’re okay,” Kara assures her and kisses her forehead. 

“I love you,” she says, her voice barely a whisper, as her eyes slowly close. 

“I love you, Lena,” Kara promises, and she lets herself drift to sleep, warm and comforted in Kara’s arms. 

\--

She wakes up in her bed, with Kara curled around her back, and there’s a moment when she could easily fall back to sleep, but her mind calls the picture from Clark to the forefront, and suddenly she is wide awake. She manages to slip out of Kara’s embrace without waking her and silently pads to the hall closet. The picture is waiting for her in her purse, and she takes it out, sets it on the kitchen table, and stares at it, sighing.

Lex is the focus of the image, with his brilliant smile, but her eye keeps getting pulled to Clark, who is grinning so…kindly up at her. She must be seven years old in this picture, Clark and Lex still more boyish than grown up. None of them have any idea that they’ll all be ripped away from each other. 

She thinks about Clark and Kara with their kind eyes and ready smiles, with their convictions, their steadfast desire to do whatever they can to help others—and marvels that to her family, they’re the world’s biggest threat. How did Lex and Lillian end up there? How did she end up on the other side?

How can anyone know Clark Kent or Kara Danvers and truly believe that Superman and Supergirl are a threat to humanity? How did Lex go from loving Clark to fearing and hating Superman?

What is preventing that from happening with her and Kara?

“Hey,” Kara says, rubbing sleep out of her eyes as she appears in the kitchen. “Everything okay?”

Lena holds out the picture to her, and Kara steps forward to take it. “Oh, wow,” she murmurs, taking it all in. “Lex Luthor with hair.” She looks up at Lena and winks, and Lena can’t help but laugh.  
  
“Clark gave me this today—or yesterday, I guess. He found it in his things back in Kansas.”  
  
“How little you are,” Kara says, and Lena hears all the fondness, all the love Kara has for her, and her heart just cracks. “Everyone looks so happy,” she says, sounding wistful.  
  
“We were,” Lena says. “Right then, we were all so happy.”  
  
Kara comes to stand beside her, and Lena leans against her. “I’m sorry you lost him,” she says softly, and Lena closes her eyes against the tears. 

“I don’t want to lose you,” Lena cries, and Kara lifts her to her feet, holds her close.

“You’re not going to lose me,” she pledges. 

“He lost Clark.”

“Because of the choices he made. You’ve had every opportunity to follow in his footsteps, and you have always chosen your own path. I think it’s the same path I’m trying to follow,” Kara says, with quiet conviction.  
  
The faith Kara has in her… she will never feel as though she truly deserves it. But she is more grateful for it than she can possibly say. “Lena, not that I’d disagree with the choices Clark made, exactly, but—I am not him. And you are not Lex. Okay? We’re making our own way.”  
  
Lena nods and leans into Kara. “Let’s go back to bed,” Kara urges softly.

“He’s almost killed Clark… He would have come after you. He tried to kill me, even. And you still believe me, that he was worth loving once?” Lena asks, and Kara sucks in a startled breath.

“Of course,” she says, sounding puzzled. “No one is born a monster. Very few people are only monsters.” She sighs and leads Lena to the couch, seeming to realize they’re not going to go back to bed anytime soon. “I idolized my parents, on Krypton. They were kind and loving and wonderful to me, so I…thought they couldn’t possibly do anything wrong. But my mother…used me as bait to send her own sister into Krypton’s most horrible prison. And my father invented the medusa virus.”  
  
“Your…oh,” Lena says, blinking in shock. “Kara…”  
  
“It was…difficult for me to face, even more difficult to make peace with. That’s why I begged you to believe me about Lillian, to help me stop the virus. If you could find a way to be better than your family, then…so could I.”

“Sweetheart,” Lena murmurs, heart aching, but Kara shakes her head. 

“I believe you that Lex was worth loving. I couldn’t even blame you for not believing me about Lillian.”  
  
“Clark loved him,” Lena says. “He took care of me when things were hard. I just… Was he always like this, and we really couldn’t see it?”

“Maybe,” Kara sighs. “But maybe not. Do you…ever want to speak to him?” she asks, and Lena snorts.  
  
“The man he is now? Never. The older brother I worshipped? All the time,” she admits. 

“I know,” Kara says and kisses her head. “I want my parents all the time. Even now. Even with the family I’ve found here.”

“I wanted him to be proud of me,” Lena says very quietly, and Kara hugs her close. 

“I know,” she says softly, as the tears fall. “I know.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

Kara lets Lena cry herself to sleep and then carries her back to bed. She doesn’t stay, though, just returns to the kitchen and stares at the photograph Lena had shown her.   
  
Clark looks almost exactly as she remembers him when he’d found her. Lena’s baby smile is instantly familiar. But Lex… Her stomach clenches as she realizes that rare, blinding grin reminds her of her sister. Something clicks, and she snorts derisively. “They have the same name,” she mutters.   
  
Back when they were first becoming friends, Lena had told her that Lex was the only one who made her feel like she was a part of the family—like she belonged. And there was only one person who had been able to make Kara feel like earth was her home: Alex. 

Alexandra. Alexander. “She’s nothing like him,” Kara tells herself, but is that true? 

Does Alex make her own rules? Risk everything to do what she thinks is correct? Refuse to listen to other people’s advice, counsel, _orders_? Is Alex ruthless and sometimes frightening? If Kara didn’t know her so well, what would she think of her?

And then…did Lex comfort a terrified little girl, flung into a brand new place with no one who could really understand her? Did he walk her to school, make sure the older kids didn’t bother her, stay up late with her when nightmares forced her from sleep? Did he promise she was a Luthor now, that this was her family, that no one would ever send her away?

Kara clenches her jaw and pushes the photograph away. It is hard—impossible—to grapple with this realization that Lex is the same person to Lena that Alex is to her. What if… what if Alex had made just one wrong turn too many? What would she have become?

It’s almost three am, but Kara needs to hear her voice. And just like she knew she would, Alex answers on the first ring, voice heavy with sleep. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“Just…lonely,” Kara says lamely.   
  
“I’m here,” Alex promises instantly, and Kara’s jaw unclenches, and she is able to take a deep breath. “Nightmares? It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”  
  
“No, not the nightmares,” Kara says softly. “Just…thinking about the past too much, I guess.”  
  
“Yeah,” Alex says, clearly fighting to contain a yawn. “You want me to come over? Or you could come here?”  
  
“No, no. I just… Just wanted to hear your voice,” Kara says, her own cracking.   
  
“I’m always here, Kara,” Alex promises.   
  
“I know. Thank you.” She takes another breath. “I love you.”  
  
“I love you too.”  
  
They don’t hang up, and Kara sits at Lena’s kitchen table, listening to the sound of her sister’s steady breaths over the phone. “Go to sleep, Alex,” she says after a while, and Alex chuckles a little.   
  
“Goodnight, Kara.”  
  
“Goodnight.”  
  
She hangs up this time and sets her phone on the table. Alex Danvers is the best person she knows: strong, fearless, loyal, protective. When everything about earth overwhelmed her, Alex stubbornly learned all the ways she could calm her down. It took a bit of trial and error, but Alex never gave up on her—even when the kids at school gave them both hell. 

Eliza and Jeremiah were both kind, both meant well, but it was Alex who gave her a home. Alex was her home. 

What must it be like for Lena, not to be able to call him at three in the morning because she needs to hear his voice? 

“She has…no one,” Kara says, and picks up the photo again. 

“She has you,” she can imagine Alex saying, and she sighs, wondering if that’s enough. 

She spends the rest of the night at the kitchen table, lost in memories, only slipping into bed when she realizes the sun is beginning to rise. Lena doesn’t wake, but almost immediately turns over and moves closer to Kara. “Hey,” she murmurs, carefully pulling Lena into her arms. 

Lena sighs and snuggles closer, and Kara kisses her head. “I got you,” she says, as Alex has always said to her. 

\--

“I hated you at first!” Alex laughs as she hands Kara a glass of wine. “Don’t you remember that?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, we had a pretty rocky start, but then… It got better.”

“Yeah, after you lost me all my friends,” Alex teases, and Kara scowls.  
  
“Your friends were terrible.”

“You are not wrong,” Alex laughs, and kisses the side of her head. 

“Do you know what I realized?” she asks, morose all of a sudden, and Alex shakes her head. “That Lex Luthor is Lena’s…Alex.”  
  
“Say again?” Alex asks, raising her eyebrows.  
  
“Lex did everything for Lena that you did for me. Made her feel like she had a home. Protected her, taught her how to survive here.”

“Are you saying that I am like Lex Luthor?” Alex asks, more confused than angry.

“No,” Kara says. “I’m saying that… Lex Luthor was once…maybe…as good as you are. At least to one person.”

“Well. No one is just a monster,” Alex says carefully, and Kara smiles wryly.

“That’s what I told Lena. He tried to have her killed, and she still loves him.”  
  
“Would you still love me if I tried to have you killed?” Alex asks, and Kara scowls, but she can see Alex isn’t teasing her.   
  
“Yes,” she says, staring at the bottom of her glass. “How could I throw all you’ve done for me away? Even…” She shakes her head. “I know this stuff already. I learned a lot of distressing things about my parents. And I still love them.”  
  
Alex drops a kiss on her head as she stands up to carry their glasses to the sink. “There’s nothing about family that isn’t complicated,” she says with a sigh. “But I promise, I will never try to have you killed.”  
  
Kara rolls her eyes and gets up to hug her sister. “Thank you,” she says sarcastically, and Alex points her toward the door. 

She heads home to Lena’s and finds her on the couch, Clark’s photo in her hand. “Hey,” Kara says, bending to kiss her head. “You doing all right?”

“Yeah, yeah. I just… I barely have anything from when we were kids,” she says quietly, and Kara moves around to sit with her. “I thought I had put him behind me. I mean, he tried to have me killed—how can I…?” Her voice is thick with tears, and Kara carefully pulls her into her lap.   
  
“You know who Lex reminds me of, in this picture?” she asks, and Lena frowns at her, confused. “Alex.”  
  
“Alex?” Lena repeats, and Kara nods.   
  
“They even have the same name,” she says, with a little laugh, and Lena blinks bemusedly at her. “When I got here, Alex was the only person who made me feel like this could be my home. She stuck by me through everything. I realized that’s what Lex did for you.”  
  
“Yes,” Lena says in a small voice.  
  
“And I realized I would love Alex even if she tried to have me killed.”  
  
Lena laughs in disbelief, and Kara smiles gently. “I know. Ridiculous, right? But… That’s family.”

“Is it? That’s not just some warped Luthor version of family?” Lena asks, and Kara shrugs.   
  
“I don’t think so. Anyway, you can remember the good parts of Lex and still acknowledge that he’s not the person you loved anymore.”

“How?” Lena demands and then hides her face in Kara’s shoulder.   
  
“I…wish I knew,” she sighs, smoothing Lena’s hair. “But love is never simple. Just like people aren’t.”

“Loving you is simple,” Lena says, her voice muffled by Kara’s sweater.  
  
“Is it? Were you not furious with me for weeks after you found out I was Supergirl?”  
  
Lena lifts her head up, frowning. “I was not furious.”  
  
Kara smiles and doesn’t argue. “I remember weeks of someone not returning my calls or texts.”

“I was not…furious at you,” Lena sighs. “Well, I was mad that you kept it from me for that long. And then I was mad at myself for thinking I had a claim to all your secrets.”

“Well, maybe not all of my secrets. But that one, yes. You had a claim to Supergirl. I just…was afraid of losing you.”

Lena puts her face back in Kara’s shoulder, and Kara smooths her hair. “Fine. Love is never simple,” she mumbles.  
  
“Nothing good ever is,” Kara replies and holds her close. 


End file.
